Lifestyle

It’s All A Mess (Or at Least Just Dating Is)





dating final

Dating in your mid-20’s – Just Don’t. Or do, I definitely shouldn’t be giving advice.

How many articles have you read just this week on dating? How many of them have argued completely conflicting ideas of which identity you should or should not portray?

Strong and independent who don’t need no man / Damsel housewife lean on a guy and follow his dreams while pretending yours matter / Or Amy Schumer. Take your pick.

I mean holy hell batman – can we do something else with our lives for a solid minute without ‘finding a Significant Other’ being the focus of everything?

The truth I’ve found is that we can for a while, but it’s going to come around here and there. And at that point you’ve got to be able to laugh at how ridiculous it is. I’m talking Monty Python levels of ridiculous.

So, in a lame comedic (maybe therapeutic) effort, I’ve decided to make chapter titles out of some mis-adventures I’ve had the immense pleasure of experiencing – all to eventually go into a book scholars will call, “I’ve never heard of that book.”

There are a few titles sprinkled in by men and women who are, I’m sure, deeply proud to call themselves my friends.

The Ginger Midget
~
Does He Seriously Make the Same Face in Every Snapchat?
~
One Year Later: He Still Texts “Yo!” at 11PM
~
How Did I Miss the Thick Russian Accent?
~
My Pretend Cousin Donny’s Wedding
~
Slowly Introducing Your S.O. to Matching Colors/Styles
~
Why Punching Me in the Lady Parts Isn’t Considered Good Foreplay
~
Ways to Hide Your “Bacne”
~
Run If He Says He’s From Chicago
~
He Only Calls You “Honey” In Front of Parents/Friends/Siblings/Strangers
~
The Crazy Daisy; and Other Ruined Childhood Toy References
~
We’ve Only Been on Three Dates But WHO ELSE ARE YOU SEEING?!
~
Finding Your Snooty Roommates Boyfriend on Bumble
~
Travelling Across the Country for Chicken Thighs and A Poor Haircut
~
Oops You’re a Married Mormon with 3 Kids
~
“I’m Sorry I’m Just So Fucked Up Right Now” – A Direct Quote
~
I Don’t Need To See My Therapist Anymore Since I Met You
~
Donkey Laugh
~
The Felon Plumber
~
How Many Accents Can I Fit In One Date
~
Wait We We’ve Been Together For The Past Three Weeks?

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

CommentLuv badge